Understand that staying in a holding pattern for years, due to hoping a specific man will choose you, is hard on your heart. Don't ever hope to be chosen; attach to a man who wants to choose you, even over all of the chicks who have potential to interfere in your relationship. When you get on his nerves, one who will still pick you. One who fears losing you more than gaining anything temporary. One who can admit wrongdoing before dogging you out emotionally, mentally, verbally, or physically. One who gives you emotional freedom to cry and express insecurity without holding your emotions against you. But if you stay stuck on that specific man who is super confused about who you are to his life, you are possibly missing out on a man who will sweep you off your feet and "just know" about you. Not all men are meant for you but if you're actually wife material someone out there won't have to take long before seeing you're The One. Attach wisely.
Dearest Future Guardian of my Heartbeat,
I am patiently waiting for you; though some days, I'm staring at the ceiling at night wondering why you're taking so long to show up. I've almost given in to an easier road, one immediately gratifying that eases loneliness and worry, but I had to remind myself, once you show up, you'll do that for me anyway. Maybe I won't recognize you until some chapters are closed. Maybe I'm still falling victim to what I want and not what I need that God is holding you back from me so I don't ruin it. Maybe I AM ready but God is not through with YOU yet, so my prayers have wrapped some eternal force field around you that my words created and is holding my place in line for your heart...maybe we have to get to the same level mentally, emotionally, and spiritually to even meet. I'll continue to wait on you because if I give in now looking back for anyone in my familiar and convenient past, I will surely miss "us"...the greatest story ever told. I pray for discernment. I pray for your peace. I pray that I am actually on the path to meeting you and that when you show up you will mirror what my spirit has set out to find and attach to. I still believe in love. I still believe in you...Please provide patience...the road has been rough. Time heals enough; you'll heal the rest.